Most of us have heard the metaphor of the “crabs in the bucket.”
It goes like this: if you place a single crab in a bucket, it can crawl out. But if you place multiple crabs in the same bucket, none will escape — because every time one tries to climb out, the others pull it back down. They all die in the bucket, clawing at each other instead of letting one escape.
Brutal, right? Sadly, it’s not far from the truth — not just in the entertainment industry, but in many industries, communities, and even relationships.
We’ve all heard the sayings:
- “It’s a dog-eat-dog world.”
- “Only the strong survive.”
- “You’ve got to be cutthroat to make it.”
There’s truth to that. But why?
Why does it have to be so competitive? Why do we treat success like it’s a zero-sum game — like there’s only so much to go around?
Is it just human nature?
The Harsh Reality — and the Softer Truth
Succeeding in the entertainment industry does take a lot.
You need talent (whatever that means — let’s be honest, it’s subjective), timing, luck, and yes — connections. And not always the flashy kind.
People assume “connections” means knowing the president of a studio, or having a famous uncle. Sure, those help. But the connections that matter most aren’t always the ones that come with red carpet access.
They’re the everyday people you meet on your journey:
- The casting assistant at that small audition.
- The reader in the room at your callback.
- The person you sat next to at that “boring” industry mixer.
I once went to a studio to audition for a single role… and ended up being called back for multiple parts. Why? Not because I wowed the execs right away — but because I treated the assistants in the waiting room like human beings. We connected. That small rapport changed my week.
Face-to-face encounters matter. Kindness matters. Respect matters.
The People Who Pull (or Push) You
Yes — there are people who don’t want to see you win.
Some might be old friends. Exes. People from your hometown who say, “Oh, you still doing that acting thing?”
But let’s be real — those same people will be the first to post about you when you land that commercial, book that role, or get published. They’ll act like they supported you the whole time.
That’s okay. Let them.
The real trap? It’s when we start giving those voices too much weight.
We spend too much time seeking validation from people who aren’t even in the industry. We ask our boyfriends, girlfriends, siblings, or old friends what they think of our work — and yes, their opinions may be well-meaning. But they’re often layered with personal history, expectations, or fears.
That’s not what you need. Not right now.
Shift Your Focus
If you’re serious about succeeding, your focus has to shift.
You don’t need everyone’s opinion. You need the feedback of people who live and breathe the field you’re in. People who understand the work. Whose opinions come from experience — not insecurity or nostalgia.
That doesn’t mean you have to blindly accept criticism. But when you hear something that stings a little, take a breath. Sit with it. Ask yourself:
“Is there truth in this? Can this help me grow?”
Not everyone is out to pull you down.
Sometimes the critique is meant to lift you up — but you’ve got to be brave enough to see it that way.
Climb Together
The entertainment industry is collaborative at its core. It’s not built on lone wolves — it runs on people working together: actors, writers, directors, gaffers, editors, producers, musicians, designers… you get the idea.
If you want to stay in the game — and grow — be someone who brings something to the table.
Let go of the crab bucket mentality.
Climb with the people around you.
And when you get the chance, be the one who reaches back down to help someone else out.
That’s the kind of success that actually lasts.
